I miss you but should't , But i do -.-

I've tried to block you memory to protect me from the pain . pretend i never knew you , and never heard your name . But the walls aren't strong enough and i fight my tears in vain . The feeling came creeping through and  the hurt is still the same . I wish i could forget you , or make you see me now . The pain will erase in time , and though i know it's over and what we had is gone , the memories will live forever in a corner of my mind .


Me : God , I asked you to take care of him  , to always make him safe and happy . I know how im asking you to make him feel love and even asked you to bring the right girl for him , someone who can take care of him , someone who will love him . But why i'm feeling this way God ? I'm hurting . I dont't understand , i should be happy for him but i'm not . I feel bad . It shouldn't be this way .